Kai's Komic Kaptions 11

"The *Dead* have had it up to here with Xev's constant demands." - theFrey

"Gimme more juvenile delinquents to kill! Now!"  - StormBorn

"Voice Over: NO ONE beats a Divine Assassin in the kitchen! NO ONE!" - PrimaNIghtwind

"Hhmmm...let's see, I have to get the moth detailed, then pick up my dry cleaning, get the 'rug' shampooed, whew! So much to do on my only day off...." - mayaxiong

"There is something protruding from your nose. Would you like me to remove it?" - lafemmenikita

"Joe Izuzu, THIS for selling Xev that lemon of a car!!!!" -googoljoy

"Oh yeah?!? Well, take that! Wait a minute, which finger is it again?" - dgrequeen

"Kai: May I introduce you to the Brunnen G equivalent of the one finger salute" -  Max Payne

"Hand over the hair mousse and no one gets hurt." - Aurora

"Okay! Which one of you put the fake dog poo in my cryopod?!?" - dgrequeen

"Put down the sissors now! The dead do not need a trim!" - TwilightRhapsody

"Who's a 'bunhead' now, punk?!" - Sarcasmagoria

"Kai shows off Mickey Mouse artifact given to him by earthling female after he let her 'cop a feel'....." - NB1

"Xev: *I* don't care what that guy says, Kai. *I* think your bum is VERY cute! Er...I mean BUN!" - PrimaNightwind

"Xev: ""Oh, honey..I forgot to tell you, my folks are coming in from Boca Raton this weekend... Kai: ""Huh? Wha....?" - mayaxiong

"Just where do you think Kai's left hand is?" - Lyekka

"Kai's Bad Fur Day" - Lyekka

"Hey, Big boy, can I pleeeease have an ice cream?" - EmeraldMaiden

"Kai: For the last time, Xev, I am not 'looking for a good time.' And I am not, nor have I ever been, a sailor." - Sarcasmagoria

"Xev sings: I know a place where the music's soft and the lights are low. I know a place where we can go...(credit:Petula Clark)" - googoljoy

"Kai: Bang Bang you're dead...Couldn't we just make love instead...Say yes, because it's what we do best...And I've had such a HARD day...(credit:George Michael)" - googoljoy

"It's yor fault the Moth got hijacked. You didn't put the club on!" - emma_peel 

"Xev: You're just jealous because I can, and you can't!" - dgrequeen

"Xev tries out her favorite Earth greeting of: 'Hey Baby!' along with a 'Pat-&-Sqeeze on the 'cheek.' Kai thinks: Why haven't I killed her?" - Aurora

"Kai suddenly realizes that Xev has sucessfully pulled tho old 'slip a thumbtack under the assassins butt as he is sitting down' trick." - Max Payne

"Hey Kai guess what? Martha Stewart redecorated your cryopod for free! Come look!" - TwilightRhapsody

"Guess what, Kai? You don't know this but I have protoblood stored in both my breasts, and when you need some, uh, nourishment, just let old Xevvie know... Ok, sweet thing?" - NB1

"Xev, goosing me isn't going to make me function anymore than any of your other ploys have." - StormBorn

"My pants may be baggy, Xev, but they don't need to be taken in *that* much...and what is a 'basket factor' anyway?" - StormBorn

"So? I may have a bad dye job, Kai--but at least my hair isn't shrinking!" - StormBorn

"Kai really doesn't care what Xev wants to see next, he's going to the Smithsonian. - theFrey

"That cloud is in a shape of a cloud!"- emma_peel

"Xev: Look! That cloud looks just like His Shadow!   Kai thinks: Yes, yes, whatever you say, Xev. Been there, killled that, don't want to stroll down memory lane today." PrimaNightwind

"Xev: Look, there's Stanley, hanging from a window ledge, aren't you going to help him?  Kai to himself: (Drat, she saw him, I was hoping to get out of the city without another delay from that weenie.) ""Uh, yeah, Xev, whatever..." - mayaxiong

"Xev: This way. Kai: no, THIS way. Xev: We should ask someone for directions. Kai: The dead don't ask for directions!" - googoljoy

"Xev: woooooo!I hope they have deodorant on this planet." - emma_peel

"Xev thinking: Maybe I can distract him so he won't notice I just cut off that annoying braid.  Kai thinking: My head feels strangely light all of a sudden." - dgrequeen

"Xev: Look here comes Stan with 790.   Kai: I'm outa here!" - TwilightRhapsody

 "Look! up in the sky!!... it's a bird, it's a plane, it's SuperStan!!!!" - NB1

"Dude! Where's my moth?" - Logan55

"No Stanley, I have not seen Xev, or any other women recently for that matter." TalonFire

"Stan shows Kai what he's been learning in Mime classes." - emma_peel

"Stan: I didn't put the starch in your pants while you were asleep in cryo, Kai, I swear I didn't! It was Xev!" - PrimaNightwind

"Stan: ...and then she took off her bikini top, and POW!! They were THIS BIG..No I SWEAR IT! It was NOT a dream!!" - mayaxiong"

"Stan: Wait a minute Kai, I can explain all about that sticky stuff in your cryopod..." - googoljoy

"Stan: Yeah, yeah, Kai, could we save the 'I have killed' speech for another time? I'm REALLY in a hurry!" - dgrequeen

"Okay, Kai, you're taking this assassin thing a bit too seriously now. Calm down." -Astartae

"Now wait a minute Kai, I didn't take your shampoo! It must have been Xev!" - TwilightRhapsody

"I certainly DO wash my hands after I use the bathroom, Dead Boy! See?? God, I didn't know the dead were so picky-unny!!" - NB1

"Kai:  The dead do *not* have wet dreams, Stanley! Tell me what happened!   Stan: Oh oh okay, I decided it was too hot in my *own* bed so I kinda slipped into the cryochamber and... you were sleeping so I didn't want to wake you... Kai... Kai! Put that down! Xev, help!" - elfie

"Not you, too, Kai! Geeze, why is everybody always after my butt?" -StormBorn

 "Just when Kai thought Xev couldn't get any more annoying . . . she does." - theFrey

"Can this marriage be saved?" - emma_peel

"Xev:  I guess they don't have hair care products on this planet, Kai. We'll try again, at the next inhabited planet." - PrimaNightwind

Xev: ...well after that, we went to Target, and found the CUTEST little outfits, but she said I looked fat in it, and I said , well how about your big butt, and then she said, but you're bigger than me, and she just... Kai:  Sigh...I hate shopping with Xev.." - mayaxiong

"Kai thinks: I hate mixers...I wish somebody would ask me to dance. Xev thinks: I hope Stan doesn't ask me to dance." - googoljoy

"Don't let that remark bother you, Kai. How would *he* know what Moth balls smell like anyway?" - Aurora

"Gah! My codpiece is starting to itch!" - dgrequeen

"Stopping at a juice bar Kai and Xev are offered free samples of carrot juice." -TwilightRhapsody

"Xev: Yep Kai, you do look a little bit like Bart Simpson." - Max Payne

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