Kai's Komic Kaptions 15

"Kai and Xev finally break the news to Stan that they have been banging away at each other from the start." - theFrey

"Xev dyes her hair, Kai gets a Mullet. They're so ready to start a Heavy Metal 80's band."  - emma_peel

"Well, this here babe digs the mullet, and that's just dandy with me. C'mon, Morticia, let's go back to my cryopod and jam to some Krokus!" - Sarcasmagoria

"So what do you think of our Goth cover band act, Stan?" - 

"Xev and Kai finally figured out what oral sex is!" - 

"Guess what, Stan? I'm really a lesbian in a dead body." - StormBorn

"I feel pretty, oh so pretty!" - StormBorn

"Michael:  Look, I know the auditions for 'Rock Star' are over, but there's still some groupies left, cut me some slack..." - mayaxiong

"Stan: I FINALLY have a sex dream about Xev...why is KAI in it?!?" - PeridotEyes

"Kai: Dammit Xev, I'M supposed to lead!" - Logan55

"Their creepy and their kooky... Their scary and their spooky... Their all together ooky... The Brunnen-G Family!" - Nika

"Kai: Come on, Stan dye your hair and join us, once you go black you'll never go back!!!!" - NB1

"Siegfried and Roy Before Las Vegas!" - BlackCloud

"Hey, theFrey! How'd you get my prom picture?!" - Aurora

"It's my bro and sis. But why don't they have green hair as mine?" - Lilitth18

"Kai: Aw, c'mon, Stan. Lemme borrow the hat. I'll only keep it a little while. Chicks dig the hat." - dgrequeen

"Kai: Hey everybody! Remember the green chick from Star Trek? Yeah, the dancer. Does this universe rock or what!!" - Max Payne

"Xev and Kai try to convince Stan to go with them to that killer new goth night club." - XevZev

"Kai: Give me some bright red lipstick and call me Robert Smith! (The Cure) " - BlackDove

"Xev: Come on Kai, let's curl each others hair!" - angelmay

"David Bowie in a scene from the adult version of 'Labyrinth.'" - DalekTek790

"Michael giggles as Brian gets his first look at today's script!" - theFrey

"Michael had souvlaki for lunch just before 'the scene.'" - StormBorn

"Kai, always the prankster, chuckles as 790 shrieks in fury as his head is now attached to Stan's body..." - mayaxiong

"Michael is happy he gets to 'mince' in this week's episode."  - PeridotEyes

"Kai: *giggling as xev lets one go*" - parasite159

"Some one got some cat nip!" - emma_peel

"Kai can't believe that Stan fell for that old assassin trick!" - Logan55

"Oooooo, I think Stan slipped me some tongue!" - BC

"*burp* Oh, excuse me! Heh heh, the poutine was just sooo good today!" - dgrequeen

"The kiss was the perfect diversion for Kai to finally slap that 'Kick Me' sign on Stan's back. Tee hee!" - Aurora

"Kai giggles as he tastes the chocolate cheesecake Stan at for dessert at dinner." - XevZev

"Kai gets a chuckle when he thinks of his long-kept secret, 'He's not really dead!!!!'" - NB1

"Kai giggles : You said a rude word! Xev: You mean codpiece? Kai cracks up." - Griever

"*NEW!* Tickle-me-Kai KAI: tee hee... that tickles!" - rave

"I'm as happy as a little gurrlll..." - BlackDove

"Kai laughs as 790 trips Stan." - Foxtrick


"Paul........ she's touching me again!" - thefrey

"No Xev the Dead do not find push-up bras exciting" - Domitrix

"I die so well, Xenia, that I'm thinking of doing Camille for my next gig...or Swan Lake. Which do you think?" - StormBorn

"Stan and I just didn't want to hurt you, Xev, that's why we didn't tell you about...us." - StormBorn

"Will you say goodbye to 790 for me Xev?" - StormBorn

"Xev: "What's this 'confession' all about Kai?   Kai: Well it...it's your DRESS! I WANT IT! Are you happy now?! I've finally said it!! And the hair, and the makeup...sigh...." - mayaxiong

"Sorry Xev, but they have these things on earth called breath mints" - parasite159

"OH GOD, XEV! Will you STOP worrying about that damn dirndle! I dunno where it is! Ask Stan! It was his idea! Or ask Vlad... it's her place! Sheesh! You try and take someone's advice..." - Nika

"Kai: Well, see, I... I picked up a few splinters when Stan was dragging me across that floor, okay?" - dgrequeen

"Kai: I do not find the presence of Vlad at all *kinky*" - Hypatia

"Maybe if I act dead she will go away...oh damn!" - QueenMagrat

"(background music)The look.. of love.. is in.. the eyes...." - Princess of Fire

"Xev: Kai, please tell me what anti-ageing cream you use..i mean 6008 years without a wrinkle, even after thawing...I've just gotta have it... Kai: (for the millionth time) The dead do not wrinkle..." - Griever

"I am sorry Xev...... the viagra is not working." - BlackDove

"It is immediately apparent that Divine Executioners were not held to the same minimum appearance requirements as Divine Assassins." - PeridotEyes winner of the third Kai Kaption Kontest!

"Yeah? Well for your information lady, not only is my chin prettier, but I don't require baling wire to keep up *my* 'do." -theFrey

"Vald: Musse or Spray Gel?  Kai: Hair spray!" - emma_peel

"Nyah nyah nyah, Vlad, my hair's sexier than yours!" - StormBorn

"Kai: Hey, baby, do you get Speedvision with that thing? I want to watch the Rally Races, I've got money on the WRX.."  - mayaxiong

"Kai thinks: I finally find a woman who appreciates the fact that I'm dead and she wants to kill me!"

"No Vlad, I cannot see your brain through your nose"

Kai: Would you step back please, you're in my 'personal space'" - Hypatia"

"Kai steels himself for the upcoming atomic wedgie." - PeridotEyes

"Kai: I'll give you ten ounces of protoblood for that bobby pin..." - NB1

"Kai finally remembers why he should fear Vlad. It was at the Divine Assassin/Executioner mixer. One to many protoblood punches and he asked her if she rented the nose out as a ski jump." - domitrix

"Kai: Whattaya gonna do, poke my eye out with that DO?" - BC

"Vlad: Betcha you can't do THAT with your brace, big boy!" - Dreams of Kai

"For the last time Vlad, I *can't* see your brain thru your nose!"

"Kai: Xev is always telling me that I'm tasty, but she dosesn't mean it quite so literally"

"Vlad: OK, you want to compare noses? Take a look at THIS honker!" - dgrequeen

"Kai: Normally the dead do not care... But there are things on Earth called breath mints...... I take it you have not heard of them?" - BlackDove

"Ooooh, Eskimo Kiss!" - QueenMagrat

"Vlad: My hairs bigger than yours! nah-nah!  Kai: Oh yeah? well my codpiece is bigger than that... (nah-nah!)" - Griever

 "Ummmm....Stan and I are having a private moment here. Do you mind." - theFrey

"Hey Ma! I found a dead assassin, can I keep him. I'll hug him and pet him and call him george!" - emma_peel

"Kai realizes that Stan was actually faith healer class 4 on the Cluster..." - Griever

"Don't hate me because I'm beautiful." - StormBorn

"Kai, last of the BrunnenG and the best kisser in two universes!" - StormBorn

"I don't know, Paul...... are you sure a poster of this is really going to sell?" - StormBorn

"Kai: What.. what happened..  Stan:  Hey, buddy it's ok, just picked you up from in front of the Shoe Shop, you were....naked...again...  Kai: I really gotta stop those Wild Turkey shooters..." - mayaxiong

"Brian gets even with Michael for the kiss." - PeridotEyes

"Stan: was it good for you, Kai my love?" - parasite159

"Stan: I always wondered what kind of styling gel you used?" - Hypatia

 Stan realizes that he hit a Brunnin-G assassin, not a racoon" - Hypatia

"Kai: I'm sorry Stanley, the Dead Do Not Cradle the Rock......" - NB1

"Stan comforts Kai after breaking the news that he and 790 are in love." - Paine

"Kai to himself: Great, one kiss and we're bonded for life." - BlackCloud

"Stan:  Boy you've get a close shave, what kind of razor do you use?

"Stan realizes that the black thing he hit with his pickup *wasn't* a racoon."

"Kai says:  Xev doesn't interest me because I'm *dead*, not because I'm gay" - Hypatia

"Kai whispering: Stan, look at the camera, they're taking a picture. " - DJ KGB

"Kai: Ack! Is he touching me? Gah! Should I say something?" - dgrequeen"

"Kai thinks: It's my own fault for kissing him on the lips. Poor Stan. He didn't have a chance against my animal magnetism. It's a *curse*! Of course... I *will* have to kill him." - Aurora

"'My mind to your mind' - ooops, wrong show" - Logan55

"Stan, I see living people!" - mellearyx

"Stan: Just hold still Kai, I think I can pull this awful bun off once and for all..." - DalekTek790

"Brian thinking:  So soft...... After they yell cut I HAVE to ask him what moisturizer he uses." - BlackDove

"This picture was taken by police right before Stan was arrested for murdering Kai.  Too bad Kai was just low on protoblood." - Foxtrick

"Stan: Xev, is it too much to ask that you clean up the cyro chamber once in a while. I mean, look at this thing lying on the floor." - Lazarus7

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