Kai's Komic Kaptions 31


"I am truly sorry. You are a nice enough looking girl, but face it, I am much prettier than you are. Life is like that, get over it." - theFrey

"Hey, wait a minute! I recognize this cloth, it was grandmother's rug!    Kai: I found it at the Goodwill---really I did" - Lizard

"MM (slightly worried tone): You're not a...fan...are you?" - Griever

"Kai: Okay. First one is free, but if you want to feel the Kai Bicep again it'll cost you." - LexxLurker

"Amber: Kai, before we get it on, I have to confess... I have mold growing on my hand!" - dgrequeen

"Kai: It is my turn, now I get to cup your breast...." - NB1

"Fifty bucks and the logo's yours. Twenty? How about ten?" - Wordsmith

"She can't keep her hands off him. I know how she feels." - Wild Woman

"EVERYBODY wants to touch the dead guy." - Wild Woman

"Kai: Hey lady, hands off the merchandise" -  darkcrow23

"Hey!don't touch what you can't afford lady" - Sue

"I am happy to add you to to the list of women I won't be snogging this season." - Wild Woman

"Hands off the merchandise, I'm listing this on eBay in four weeks." - Wild Woman

"On one side of the ring she's stuck to kai on the other side of the ring she's stuck to Saturn. I hate those days!" - GotHope

"Amber: Ewww... this thing smells kinda funky.  Kai: I've been wearing it for over 6000 years, what do you expect?" - Scifiend 

"Amber: Hey, cool threads, dead guy!  Kai: It's Giorgio Armani... don't you just LOVE it?" - scifiend

"Kai: Pssst..I've got a secret...My uniform is made of Superglue..." - mayaxiong

"Amber: Kai, you're so gorgeous, can I touch you?  Kai:  The Dead do not like Skanks touching them..." - mayaxiong

"Kai: Oh, come on! I *invented* the 'I'll examine your shoulder to see if it's infected' line." - DalekTek790

"Amber: Kai, do you know where I'd love to see this uniform? On the floor of my bedroom in the morning...." - NB1

"Kai: It is the uniform of the Devine Assassin. You could say I am always dressed to kill.....
" - "NB1



"I'm such a hot chick, I need to chill down for a bit." - theBrother

"Amber: Hmm, soo is this how you get stiff?" - LexxLurker

"Amber: No! It's mine now, and I'm keeping it!    Kai: No, it's *mine*, and I'm bracing you!" - dgrequeen

"Amber: (very sultry): You know what Kai? I bet you're good in the cryopod...." - NB1

"Somebody's been sleeping in *my* bed too--and here she is!" - Wordsmith

"Kai: You've changed, Vlad." - DalekTek790

"Amber attempts to attract Kai by rolling about in his cryo-bed. Ha." - Wild Woman

"To pull up the ratings the beans threw in another assassin." - GotHope

"Amber: Hey there stud, I can help you heat up this crypod..  Kai: Not even if it would help the Space Program..." - mayaxiong

"Amber: Come on Kai, just one little roll in the hay...er..ice?  Kai:  Beat it, Amber, before I have Xev come in here and bitch-slap you..." - mayaxiong

"Kai sighs: Are you trying to seduce me" - darkcrow23

"Kai realises that it wasn't Goldilocks who had been sleeping in his bed." - Griever

"Careful...your bod will freeze that way." - StormBorn



"Hummm,  a little off the top, touch up the roots, oh... and condition those split ends. Why sure, I think I can give you a new look." - theFrey

"Amber: You've got a mark on your face. Hold still, just let me wet my finger and see if I can rub it off." - dgrequeen

"Amber: Maybe the reason you don't understand me Kai, is because you are looking about twelve inches below where my lips are...." - NB1

"The Dead do not do chicks with bad hair." - PeridotEyes

"Amber: Sorry, but I brushed before I left Earth. Got any breath mints?" - Wild Woman

"No my hands are not finger food" - darkcrow23

"You don't have what it takes to get me going, Amber. Give it up." - PeridotEyes

"Oh God! His Gothic is soooo wrong." - GotHope

"Michael once again not looking his female co-stars in the eye during filming... MM: Hmmmm nice um....outfit..." - mayaxiong

"Amber: After our last date, I noticed I was getting a cold sore...Do you have anything to tell me, Kai?   Kai: Well, yes, I have the dreaded Cluster Herpes.." - mayaxiong

"These Dentyne Ice commercials just get weirder and weirder." - DalekTek790

"Amber is contemplating a *thud*..." Griever



"Oh that, it's just the sci-fi logo, ignore it, the place is lousy with them." - theFrey

"Amber: Its okay Kai, it happens to *everyone*!" - LexxLurker

"Kai: Oo! Sorry about that! I thought sure I'd aimed for your hair, but... I think we have a first aid kit around here somewhere." - dgrequeen

"Kai: Please don't pull on that." - DalekTek790

"Amber is dumbfounded by the Assassin's Rods." - PeridotEyes

"What are they looking at?" - Wild Woman

"...and here is where I cut off my forearm to show Bunny that I am not alive, and on the Cluster...   Amber is sorry she asked." - PeridotEyes

"Amber lusts after Kai's brace." - Wild Woman

"Kai: Gee I'm sorry I sneezed Proto-snot all over you Amber, let me help you clean that off...  Amber: Ewwyech" - mayaxiong

"Kai and Amber starring together in a new Soap Opera,  'The Ancient and Trashy'... Kai: Amber dear, I must confess I've been unfaithfull    Amber: Don't tell me, it's the robot head again, isn't it?" -mayaxiong

"Kai: er...you have really bad dandruff..." - Griever

"Kai to the Logo: It's not what it looks like" - darkcrow23

"Kai: The man on the street told me it was a palm pilot.    Amber: Uh, Kai, that's a $5 calculator." - canuk

"You're really Kate Jackson from Charlie's Angels, aren't you?" - StormBorn



"pfftttt.. pfftttt.. five more freaking episodes and I lose this freaking love lock hanging in my face all day long." - theFrey

"Well maybe I *could* hit my mark, if this d*mn hair wasn't in my way." - theBrother

"All right.... *who* let the fan in?" -  theBrother

"Kai: I've killed mothers with their babies.....but its been a long time since we had attractive brunettes on this show" - LexxLurker

"Michael: Damn, I need to scratch! Are they looking?" - dgrequeen


"Kai: I am ninja. master of the night.  Xev offscreen: Kai who are you talking to" - darkcrow23

"Only four more, I can make it, only four more." - PeridotEyes

"MM: What do you mean it's a good thing the show is ending 'cause I'm starting to get wrinkles..?! Excuse Me?" - mayaxiong

"MM fumes secretly with jealousy as he watches the fans drool over Brendan Fraser, who's making a surprise visit to the set... Damn amateur... they're MY droolers!!" - mayaxiong

"Kai: No, I will not move to the Dark Side of the force Darth..." - Griever

"Kai: Ya know, sometimes you make my proto-blood boil...." - NB1

"Whaddaya mean? This is my 'happy face'!" - StormBorn


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