Kai's Komic Kaptions 40


Yes, it does have interesting pictures in it Xev. It is called 'The Joy of Sex', and no. I will not read it to you before bedtime. - theFrey

Look here, missy! If I've told you once I've told you a thousand times, my love organ does not function. Thank you so *very* much for reminding me. - stormsweeper

Kai: Its called a Book Xev.. And no you can not eat it. Midori 

Kai: Xev, I promise you, once I have discovered what Longbore is up to and made sure Stan is safe, I will look for this Harry Potter fellow for you. - NB1

Don't look now, Xev, but that pervert with the camera is back! - Sassy Assassin

Kai: No,..Xev,..it is not a recipe book for making baby cluster lizards!! - Stanelle 

Excuse me? You look like you might know. Where's the Red Light District?  - P_T_Bando 

Rook jumps QUEEN! Bishops' JUMP QUEEN! KNIGHTS AND PAWNS JUMP QUEEN! ....GANGBANG! (I love Mel Brooks!) - Blues Man

MM to fan: Look I don't care how much you love the show, I still ain't gonna autograph your book... - Griever 


  The entire group watches in horror as the SciFi channel morfs into the 'Low Budget Horror Movies with Miss Cleo and Friends' Channel. - theFrey

Damn! Windows crashed again! Kai, please kill Bill Gates. - HDS

Kai: Are you guys making fun of me on theFrey's site again? - P_T_Bando

Kai: Good work, Tina, now we are all logged in as Sadgeezers! - NB1

Everyone loves the Osbournes... - Griever

Patsy: The answer is ten.   Tina:  No it's fifty.   Longbore: You two are obviously morons the answer is twenty-five.  Kai: You are all the WEAKEST LINK GOOD BYE - Midori 

Kai: Who is Dr. Laura? And why are there naked pictures of her on the Internet? - sci4kai 

Kai: Using a apple monitor for reviewing the scenes we just taped? You guys are so low budget! - emma_peel

Kai: What do you mean Divine Assassins can't be on Sesame Street? I want to meet Big Bird,..and I want to tickle Elmo with my brace!! - Stanelle 

They call it 'PONG', they say it's going to change EVERYTHING! - Blues Man

Dougal: It's called 'Big Brother 3', and it's the bestest show *ever*!  Kai thinks: Yeesh, this really *is*a type 13 planet! - Sarcasmagori

Kai: Geez Longbore, how many episodes of 'Cowboy Bebop' did you download?- DalekTek790- - 
Dr .Phoney: hey look Kai a Lexx website   Kai: Yes I see those links, crew bios, naked pictures of crew... what???? - ZEVOFB3K

Micheal Mcmanus accidentally steps onto the set of the lone gunmen (x-file spin off show)- brett




It was a steady gig. What was I thinking? - theFrey

Kai reads the classifieds: Sale - One used freezer, slight smell $100.  Wanted - Cadavers needed! For all female school. Employment - Donor card needed.  Kai: Damn. - HDS 

Wanted - Dead Assasins, FT, No Benefits, Min. 4 seasons Exp... - P_T_Bando

Kai Reads: Bun heads are the new fashion!!    Kai Thinks:  DAMN IT!  knew I should have gotten that Perm - Midori

Kai thinking to himself after reading review of MTV Awards: Mmmmmmmmmmm, if this Britney Spears person is not a girl, yet not a woman, what the hell is she??? - NB1

They've had more than 6,000 years, and they STILL haven't bothered to post my obituary! - Sassy Assassin

Kai: I do not understand today's 'Far Side' strip. - sci4kai

'Afghanistan...Osama Bin Laden...Iraq...Saddam Hussein...George W. Bush...Israel...Pakistan....' Hmm. Uh, Xev? Stanley? I advise that we leave this Type-13 planet SOONER rather than LATER. - sci4kai 

Good lord! What is that dog doing to that fire hydrant? - emma_peel 

...Praise the Lord! I too have sinned! I have skirted the very fires of DAMNATION! But GOD, has brought me back from the brink! Halleleujah! Can I have an AMEN, Brothers and Sisters!? - Blues Man

Who circled the ad for Superclips?" - Sassy Assassin

Lil boy:  You are weird Mister.  Kai:  Well what the hell do you expect when I've been cooped up with these two?????!!!!!- Zevofb3k




Walk in to the light? Why? - theFrey

Alright, who took my Brylcreem?" - P_T_Bando

Are you sure thats the light zone? - Midori

Kai: You are traveling through another dimension. A dimension not only of sight and sound, but of mind. A journey into a wondrous land whose boundaries are that of imagination. That is the signpost up ahead. Your next stop; The Twilight Zone. - sci4kai

Umm Director of Photography, I need a reflector for my other side!? - emma_peel

Once more, Michael regrets having left the lighting director off of his Christmas Card List! - Sassy Assassin 

Assasin, DIVINE Assasin! - Blues Man

Isn't the screen supposed to be blue? - DalekTek790




Kai grimaces, yet another woman with bad hair making a play for him... It was almost more than a dead Brunnen-g could take.  - theFrey

Kai: No, I have not heard of a '69 position'. Why do you ask? - Kat Kram

Kai: Listen miss, I am Kai, I am dead, THE dead do not Squeeze and Please. (mumbles low) unless their by themselves. - Midori 

Kai: 790 - I need instructions to return to the Lexx, the present location of Xev and Stan and a cure for a toothache... - NB1

Kai: I am sorry. I do not know what compelled me to rip off your earlobe while you were trying to kiss me. - sci4kai

No,..it is not that I am prettier than you. You see,..It's my disability!! I am living impaired!!- Stanelle

Well you see, it all started with my mother...- P_T_Bando

And no, I really don't care what your boyfriend says when he sees that hickey! - Sassy Assassin- 

Do you mind, this is the men's room! - P_T_Bando 

NO, the Dead do NOT get sexually frustrated! Now stop asking! -  Blues Man

Tina: Do you like it? I just got it done! I thought I'd go for the Britney Spears look. Hey where are you going!!!    Kai: Geesh! And I thought *I* had bad hair! - Xev_Clusterlizard_loveslave 


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