Kai's Komic Kaptions 42


God who? 'come on Lexx, quit fooling around. - theFrey

Kai: Look 790, they came back to make fun of me again.. I see you looking at me trying to come up with something obnoxious to say!! Just you wait and see what happens when you click on that button to submit your kaption this time!!  ::sound of brace clicking:: Go on... It will be the last time you ridicule me!! - Midori

790: Me and you together! Alone!    Kai: NOOOO!!- HDS 

Kai: Trick or treat! My name is Kai and I am going Halloween begging tonight with my little 790 pumpkin on wheels! I am dressed as a Divine Assassin and 790 is dressed as a robot head!!- Stanelle 

Can't you hear them? Hairdressers...and they're getting closer...- Mysteriosa

Kai thinking: is 790 staring at my butt, I know its sexy but please save some for the ladies....- melanie 

Officials are looking for the perpetrators who were caught on closed circuit camera rummaging through the underwear drawer of Xev Bellringer on the Lexx..- NB1

After 2 hours, the staring contest between Kai, 790 and the Techies in the catwalks, continues on. Little do the techies know that niether Kai nor 790 can blink, and little do Kai and 790 know that techies, do not blink.- Theta 

Kai replaces his brace with the infamous Sci-Fi logo.- P_T_Bando

Christmas Morning on the Lexx was very disappointing. Kai wanted a puppy, but got a robot head.- ottokell

Kai: Psst....  790 do you get the feeling that we're being watched. -darkcrow




Cue Music: Here I commme to save the Daaaay! - theFrey

Kai just heard that Vidal Sassoon is having a major sale! - theFrey

Kooh! Blimy! It's Danger Dead!- HDS 

Michael finally realizes that the 5 martini lunches have got to stop.- Sassy Assassin 

Just as Kai is about to rescue Stan & Xev, He remembers 'Should of taken that diarrhea pill.' - lana evitneter

One small step for a Brunnen-G - one giant step for Brunnen-G kind!- Logan55

Stop laughing! You'd have trouble getting out of this thing if you were 2,000 years old too!- Sassy Assassin 

Stupid crazy glue...the dead do not model make...anymore...- Mysteriosa- 

In his spare time, Kai secretly practices Twister.- Mysteriosa

Aaaghhh!!!! Who put Vaseline on the moth leg?!? - dgrequeen

Gotta go, gotta go, gotta go RIGHT NOW! - TwilightRhapsody 

Kai: Dammit! I need to be pushed off a cliff again!!!! I gotta find some friends, quick!   Narrator: Next week on Lexx, Special appearances by Courtney Cox and Jennifer Aniston. - NoBullczw

Kai learned to never again accept eggnogg from Techies.  Techie: *snicker* laxitive, it's a wonderful thing. - Theta

Dead Man Walking...well, sort of.- Sassy Assassin 

When is Stan gonna' put some damn running boards on these things?- P_T_Bando

Hi-Oh-AYE-oh, it's off to work I go! - Sassy Assassin

Ok! That's it you little logo, I'm coming to kick your @ss!- Vextraxev

Kai thinking: Chicks never seem impressed when I jump out of a moth. Perhaps the dead would look cooler in a PT Cruiser.- ottokell



Kai considers Tina's offer. Hummmm, a complete reprogramming of 790 in exchange for a quickie... - theFrey

I have been working on making my sweater tighter.   Kai: Yes, I see.- HDS

How many smurfs did you have to kill to make that sweater?- stormsweeper

Michael! Michael! Can I have your Autograph?   MM: Um.. Who me? No.. I'm not Michael! HOW DARE YOU! Michael only wishes he were as sexy as me! - Midori

Sorry, Tina, Assassins don't make passes at lasses who wear glasses! - Sassy Assassin

You want to do WHAT with my bun? - Sassy Assassin

Kai: Tina, Laura Petrie called, she wants her wardrobe back. - Sarcasmagoria

Michael: If this is a convention then where are the other fans? - DalekTek790

No sorry, I really couldn't tell you whether the Heavens' Gate people got to where they were going or not! - Sassy Assassin

Tina: Come on, Oookie Pookie!! Who got up on the wrong side of the cryopod this morning???? Let's see a smile on Kai-Kai's face!!! That's it, you know Tina-weena wuvs you!!! (The brace can be heard clicking).... - NB1

Kai: What do you mean...my hairdresser is better than your hairdresser! I do my own hair!! - Stanelle Yodere 

Kai, look at me when I'm talking to you. Kai: Who wha? Oh (reverting his eyes back up). - HDS 

Tina: No, I am not Harry Potter!! - midori

At 2009 years old, Kai has nearly reached the bottom of the groupie barrel. He shudders to think what he'll scrape up when he gets to be Mick Jagger's age! - streudel

Kai: Ya know, stalking is a whole lot more effective when you don't giggle.- ottokell


Kai would never admit it to Xev, but he gets a distinctly .... pleasurable ...feeling when a female strokes his diagnostic ports. - theFrey 

Kai sings: Put your head on my shoulder...... - HDS 

Tell me again how much you like the hair. - stormsweeper

Kai hopes that the ickle organisms that maintain his clothes may actually start to attack Tina... - Griever

Everywhere I go, *somebody* wants a piece of assassin! - Sassy Assassin 

Look, 'proto blood failure' is *my* excuse, so get off me already! - Sassy Assassin

Suck up all you want. I am *not* giving you a cigarette. - Mysteriosa

Once again the gravitational magnetic force of Kai's bun has sucked in another groupie- midori 

Kai softly singing to the Brunnen G Song: No Way Ho! I'mmm Sorr-ray! No Way Ma! Of getting this Brunnen Geeeeeeeeee!!!!!!" - NB1 

Kai:Last time I'm babysitting a teenager! - Leslie

OOOOH! Is that cashmere?- P_T_Bando

You know I'm allergic to wool don't you.- P_T_Bando

Tina: Oh, look, Tina's found herself a Treasure Chest!!!- NB1 

Kai: Ewww! please don't drool on the fabric!- Griever

Kai singing: Rock a bye, nerd girl, on the tree top! When the brace swings, your head will go plop! When the head plops, the body will fall! Away will sneak Kai, brace, bun and all!- ottokell

I think it's the mating call for the Brunnen-G. - Kerri



Tina is blissfully unaware that the only reason that Kai is snogging her, is to punish 790 for all the bad pornographic poetry he spouts. - theFrey

Narrator: And this week, on 'The Bachelor'..... - Sassy Assassin

790: I knew it! You are cheating on me, after all I have done for you! I cleaned your clothes, cooked your food, gave you MY love and this is the way you treat me? that is it I am leaving mister! - melanie

Tina thinks: The black hair! The white skin! The assassin's uniform!!!!! Who'd ever think I'd be kissing Michael Jackson!!!! - NoBullczw

790 admires his new Kai and Tina snowglobe. - midori

790 flips through the soaps on day time television while waits for the others to return to the Lexx. . . .- Xev_Clusterlizard_loveslave 

Just when you thought porn couldn't get any worse. - Theta

Tina is unaware of Kai and 790's scheme to get her on camera. Mwahahaha!" - P_T_Bando

790: I've secretly switched Tina's lipgloss with Krazy Glue. Let's see if she notices!- ottokell




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