Kai's Komic Kaptions 48


Listen here Behive Boy. I have had it up to here with 'the dead do nots', you better start thowing in a few, 'the dead don't mind trying's'. Got it?! -  theFrey

Xev: I'm telling you Kai, my boobs have gotten bigger!  Kai: "The dead do not care about boobs Xev, how many times do I have to tell you? - Dee

How dare you speak to the sci-fi logo that way!  You're giving it a complex! - Honeybunny

No, I will NOT take 790 back;  you are STUCK with him! -Sassy Assassin

Xev: What do you mean your kicking me off the show?   Kai: it's your time to go..I am sorry.  Xev: You don't even care, do you?  Kai: The dead do not have feelings, remember.   Xev: You voted in that loser Stan over me?  Kai:.......  - Sexy Assassin

Of course I'm yelling at you, ya big dummy....not only did you lose the moths and come back with a bunch of lousy balloons, you're also standing on my FOOT! - Sassy Assassin

Don't look at me in that tone of voice! - Gary H.



  To amuse Stan, Lexx decides to display images from Xev in the shower. Stan *is* amused. He mainly amused to see Xev caught dead to rights using Kai's Brunen G-your-hair-smells-terriffic shampoo. - theFrey

Stan:  Would you look at the rack on that babe!   Kai:The dead do not look at......whoa, WHAT'S holding that top up?!? - Sassy Assassin

Stan: Whoa Kai check out the booty on her. - Michele C.

Stan: So, Kai.  Whadd'ya think?  Doesn't the bridge look a little more homey now that I finally hung up my neon beer sign collection? - Purple Unicorn

Stan: Shouldn't we be using a box with a hole in the top? - Gary H.



No, Stanley, the sci-fi logo does not work like the communicators on Star Trek.  Anyway, you're too low. - WilliamsXev

I'm sorry, Stanley, but the dead do not participate in 'Laurel and Hardy' routines. - Sassy Assassin

Yeah, Stanley, you 'da man'.  Now get lost. - Sassy Assassin

Me, Kai?  You picked me over Xev? I'm so happy.  - Michele C.

Stan: I can go with you, Kai to the prom if you don't want to go alone.   Kai: That's okay, Stan. I do not require your assistance.

Stan: Well, that's just fine, Kai. You don't like my beer sign collection?  What do you suggest for a decorating theme?   Kai: I remember having a certain fondness for balloons...... - Purple Unicorn

Stan: your going down to a planet!? Can I come?!    Kai: No Stanley, I do not require your assistance.   Stan: Come on please, can I come?!   Kai: No Stanley, I do not require your assistance on the planet, I am just going to get more food for the lexx    Stan: I can get more food for the lexx too.   Kai: No Stanley, I am going alone, good-bye.  Stan: I'll be here when you get back.    Kai sighs: Alright Stanley - Corie J

Stan: See, Kai. Aren't you glad I put the video camera in your bun when we went to the Las Vegas "Topless" shows? Now we can watch them on Lexx's view screen when ever we want. (turns to the view screen and yells) Shake it baby, shake it!!!! - Toad Lady

Wahhh?!!? Actor Kai is distracted just as he had finially trapped that pesky sci-fi logo. - theFrey

MM says to wardrobe personnel: Damn it all! Is the wig not bad enough?? Do I also have to have helmet hair??!! - Dee

Kai:  Look Bullwinkle i can make a scifi logo appearer out of my hat. - Michele C.

And THIS.......This is what is left of the head of the writer who wrote this scene! - Sassy Assassin

Michael, in a desperate bid to find gainful employment anywhere other than on the Lexx set, auditions as Gene Simmons in a KISS cover band. - Honeybunny

MM:  I'm freezing my @ss off, and THIS is the best that wardrobe could come up with? - Sassy Assassin

Basra Kai! - Griever

MM Ponders: I no longer need to punish, deceive or compromise myself. Unless, of course, I want to stay employed. - Raven495

Is that someone at the door? Crap where's my robe? - Gary H




'Go get it back you Rat B*stard!' A very unhappy Xenia, has just found out about the unsigned Season 5 contract that Michael has turned in to the front office. - theFrey  

Kai: Yep stupid dumb alien babe I'm sleeping. Sleeping my eyes away on your tits! - Leslie O.

You're right!  That's the biggest booger I've ever seen! - Sassy Assassin

Xev: Kai how you like my new Scifi tattoo on my breast? - Michele C.

Kai and the sci-fi logo sneak a sly look at Xev's cleavage. - WilliamsXev

Did you put beans up your nose *again*? - Audry H.

Xev:  Kai, Is that really You? Alive Kai:  Who are you?  Yes I am he. - Jhevz

Kai: "Face it, Xev.  You're just jealous because I'm prettier than you." - Purple Unicorn

Uh, yes, there is definitely something wrong there. Good thing I've got someone who specializes in pos-mortem dentistry. Nadezda K.

In another desperate bid for "anything-but-Lexx" employment, Kai and Zev pose for the covers of Romance novels. - Honeybunny

Hey Xev, did I get all the nose hairs? - Dee

I never thought I'd say this, but......I liked you better when you were dead!   *grrrowwllll*! - Sassy Assassin

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